TIPS TERBAIK UNTUK SUAMI KETIKA ISTERI SEDANG BERPANTANG?

1- Berapa ramai para suami yang sanggup bersusah payah untuk menjaga isteri sewaktu di dalam pantang?
2- Berapa ramai yang tahu resepi atau makanan yang sesuai untuk isteri dalam pantang?
3- Berapa ramai yang sanggup belajar mandikan bayi baru lahir yang masih lembut badan dan tulang nya tu?

Yang biasa kita dengar, apabila isteri bersalin, isteri akan dihantar balik kampung untuk dijaga oleh ibu mertua ataupun ibu sendiri. Encik suami? Adakah anda menghabiskan masa-masa cuti anda untuk enjoy? Diharapkan semua suami yang membaca artikel ini, adalah suami yang bertanggungjawab kepada isteri anda….

Encik-encik suami sekalian, tahukah anda, sakit melahirkan pernah disenaraikan sebagai kesakitan ranking kedua selepas sakitnya dicabut nyawa.....Berkorbanlah sebanyak manapun untuk jaga isteri selepas dia melahirkan, tidak akan dapat menebus semula kesakitan melahirkan itu. Jadi, tidak salah sekiranya anda menunaikan permintaan isteri anda jika isteri anda meminta bantuan.Lebih baik sekiranya, anda bertindak dahulu sebelum diminta atau disuruh oleh isteri anda.. .Ingatlah…Isteri anda telah bertarung nyawa melahirkan zuriat anda….

Antara tips yang para suami boleh praktikkan sewaktu isteri sedang dalam pantang ialah:-
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1. Para suami, bangunlah lebih awal sebelum isteri bangun dari tidur selama tempoh berpantang. Sediakanlah air mandian untuk isteri anda. Rebuskan daun-daun kayu untuk air mandian si isteri. Biasanya seminggu pertama, digalakkan mandi air rebusan daun ini untuk kembalikan kesegaran badan. Kalau susah nak jumpa daun-daun ubat untuk mandian, cukuplah sekadar menyediakan air suam untuk mandian isteri (bagi yang tak mempunyai water heater).

2. Sediakan sarapan untuk isteri seawal mungkin. Sebaiknya lepas solat Subuh, sediakanlah sarapan untuk isteri anda…Kalau boleh, tidak perlu sambung tidur semula…Kalau tak dapat sediakan sarapan yang agak berat, memadai segelas milo dan roti bakar..Pasti isteri anda rasa amat dihargai…

3. Cubalah belajar untuk mandikan baby anda walaupun baby anda masih lembut badannya.. Kalaulah anda tiada kemahiran mandikan baby ataupun tak berbakat langsung, sekurang-kurangnya bantulah isteri, ibu atau mentua sediakan air mandian. Bayi biasanya dimandikan dengan air suam untuk elakkan hypothermia. Pada peringkat awal, kawalan suhu badan bayi masih lemah.

4. Jika kelahiran ini bukan kelahiran yang pertama (maksudnya sudah ada 1-2 anak sebelumnya), pastikan segala urusan anak-anak itu diuruskan. Janganlah diharapkan isteri yang baru melahirkan itu untuk menjaga anak-anak yang lain. Biarkan si isteri berehat sepenuhnya dengan bayi yang baru dilahirkan. Urusan-urusan yang dimaksudkan merangkumi makan-minum, mandi, pakaian sehinggalah menidurkan anak.

5. Sediakan keperluan-keperluan yang sering dianggap remeh, berhampiran isteri seperti sebotol air minuman berserta gelas, tuala, bakul baju kotor, majalah dan buku kegemaran (untuk mengelakkan boring).

6. Sentiasa berada di sisi isteri untuk menghulurkan bantuan apa-apa yang perlu. Jangan sampai isteri terpaksa menjerit-jerit memanggil untuk minta bantuan sedangkan si suami tertidur di depan televisyen selepas menonton astro.

7. Pastikan persekitaran isteri dan bayi sentiasa bersih dan kemas. Bantu isteri mengumpulkan pakaian kotor dan basuhlah pakaian-pakaian itu. Tidak susah sekiranya anda menggunakan mesin basuh. Jangan harapkan isteri untuk bangun berjalan untuk membasuh dan menyidai pakaian. Dalam tempoh berpantang, yakinkan isteri tugasan membasuh, menjemur dan mengangkat pakaian boleh dilakukan oleh anda. Setakat melipat tu, tak apalah dilakukan oleh isteri sebab ia termasuk dalam kategori kerja ringan.

8. Sungguhpun anda letih, janganlah ditunjukkan depan isteri. Isteri perlukan semangat untuk pulih dari kesan-kesan melahirkan. Jika suami tiada semangat, sentiasa lesu dan lemah, isteri akan rasa sedih dan mungkin menggalakkan terjadinya kemurungan atau post-partum depression.

9. Ikhlaskan diri menjaga isteri anda kerana dia adalah amanah. Jika sebelum ini isteri menghabiskan lebih 365 hari dalam setahun menjaga makan minum, pakaian anda dan anak2 lain, apalah salahnya memanjakan dia hanya untuk tempoh 40 hari berpantang. Inilah masanya anda buktikan cinta dan kasih sayang anda padanya.

Mungkin sukar untuk menjadi suami yang dapat memenuhi tips di atas…Namun, sekiranya anda para suami, berusaha untuk memberikan yang terbaik untuk isteri dan anak-anak anda…Pasti anda dapat lakukannya dengan mudah…Jika ada para suami yang berkecil hati dengan artikel ini, saya mohon maaf..Niat saya cuma ingin berkongsi kebaikan kepada semua…Sama-samalah kita berubah kea rah yang lebih baik…InsyaAllah…

Credit to : WonderfulLife.my

Toddlers – Planning a Vacation with Kids

by: Spiffy Baby

Got Toddlers? Got Chaos! Planning any kind of trip with toddlers can be complicated. There are certain things to keep in mind that might help preserve your sanity and possibly even let you have a little bit of fun together as a family.

Arrive Leisurely

Traveling with a toddler can take a toll on even the most patient parent. If you are flying, the experience can be exciting and will keep them occupied for about ten minutes before your little one is ready to start a full-scale exploration effort. In an airplane you do have the opportunity to get up and move around – take a trip to the restroom or, pilot willing, consider a trip to the cockpit.

Car rides can be complicated as well. Fortunately, toddlers are great at napping in the car, so you might consider leaving right before naptime and letting your enthusiastic one sleep the first couple of hours. A lot of parents also drive in the evening in hopes of a sleepy car ride for longer than a few hours.

While your toddler is awake, consider a favorite video, toys (http://www.spiffybaby.com/Toys-Playtime-p-1-c-5.html), books, coloring, action figures, snacks and anything else you can think of to keep them entertained. Plan on plenty of stops along the way to get out, change diapers and stretch legs. Rushing to get anywhere just makes things more stressful, so don’t get in a hurry.

Maintain a Routine

Your toddler probably has a nice nap routine at home, and vacation is not a time to wing it. If your little one naps at noon every day, move mountains to help them nap at noon on the road. Take a break in the hotel room or alternate separate parent activities so someone is there to help even the most reluctant toddler take a break in a busy day. Try to keep bedtime reasonably close to normal, too – a tired toddler is not a toddler that travels well.

Keep it Loose

If you are a scheduling fanatic when it comes to travel, toddler travel may not be for you. Plan activities with plenty of cushion time in between. Toddlers aren’t able to appreciate fine architecture, but they love a good fountain or the local zoo. Find activities that have a little bit of something for everyone – zoos, parks, beaches, hikes, wildlife, etc…

Mix “grown-up” activities in with toddler activities to give everyone something to look forward to. You might also want to pick a few of the most important landmarks to see and leave the rest for when your child has an attention span longer than fifteen minutes. Above all, just remember that this should be fun for everyone – even if you never leave the hotel pool!

4th week of July : PARENTING

Ten Basic Principles of Good Parenting
There Is A Science To Raising Children

Are you constantly searching the latest on parenting to make sure you are doing everything exactly right? It's time to relax. Temple University psychologist, Laurence Steinberg, says that perfect parents just don’t exist.

“Most parents are pretty good parents,” says Steinberg, “But I’ve never met a parent who is perfect 100 percent of the time. We all can improve our batting average.”

Here is a quick overview of the Ten Basic Principles:

1. What you do matters.
“Tell yourself that every day. How you treat and respond to your child should come from a knowledgeable, deliberate sense of what you want to accomplish. Always ask yourself: What effect will my decision have on my child?”

2. You cannot be too loving.
“When it comes to genuine expressions of warmth and affection, you cannot love your child too much. It is simply not possible to spoil a child with love. What we often think of as the product of spoiling a child is never the result of showing a child too much love. It is usually the consequence of giving a child things in place of love—things like leniency, lowered expectations or material possessions.”

3. Be involved in your child’s life.
"Being an involved parent takes time and is hard work, and it often means rethinking and rearranging your priorities. It frequently means sacrificing what you want to do for what your child needs you to do. Be there mentally as well as physically.”

4. Adapt your parenting to fit your child.
“Make sure your parenting keeps pace with your child’s development. You may wish you could slow down or freeze-frame your child’s life, but this is the last thing he wants. You may be fighting getting older, but all he wants is to grow up. The same drive for independence that is making your three-year-old say ‘no’ all the time is what’s motivating him to be toilet trained. The same intellectual growth spurt that is making your 13-year-old curious and inquisitive in the classroom also is making her argumentative at the dinner table.”

5. Establish and set rules.
“If you don’t manage your child’s behavior when he is young, he will have a hard time learning how to manage himself when he is older and you aren’t around. Any time of the day or night, you should always be able to answer these three questions: Where is my child? Who is with my child? What is my child doing? The rules your child has learned from you are going to shape the rules he applies to himself.”

6. Foster your child’s independence.
“Setting limits helps your child develop a sense of self-control. Encouraging independence helps her develop a sense of self-direction. To be successful in life, she’s going to need both. Accepting that it is normal for children to push for autonomy is absolutely key to effective parenting. Many parents mistakenly equate their child’s independence with rebelliousness or disobedience. Children push for independence because it is part of human nature to want to feel in control rather than to feel controlled by someone else.”

7. Be consistent.
“If your rules vary from day to day in an unpredictable fashion, or if you enforce them only intermittently, your child’s misbehavior is your fault, not his. Your most important disciplinary tool is consistency. Identify your non-negotiables. The more your authority is based on wisdom and not on power, the less your child will challenge it.”

8. Avoid harsh discipline.
“Of all the forms of punishment that parents use, the one with the worst side effects is physical punishment. Children who are spanked, hit or slapped are more prone to fighting with other children. They are more likely to be bullies and more likely to use aggression to solve disputes with others.”

9. Explain your rules and decisions.
“Good parents have expectations they want their child to live up to. Generally, parents overexplain to young children and underexplain to adolescents. What is obvious to you may not be evident to a 12-year-old. He doesn’t have the priorities, judgment or experience that you have.”

10. Treat your child with respect.
“The best way to get respectful treatment from your child is to treat him respectfully. You should give your child the same courtesies you would give to anyone else. Speak to him politely. Respect his opinion. Pay attention when he is speaking to you. Treat him kindly. Try to please him when you can. Children treat others the way their parents treat them. Your relationship with your child is the foundation for her relationships with others.”

There is no guarantee that following these guidelines will result in perfect parents... remember, there is no such thing!

Good parenting, says Steinberg, is “parenting that fosters psychological adjustment—elements like honesty, empathy, self-reliance, kindness, cooperation, self-control and cheerfulness.

“Good parenting is parenting that helps children succeed in school,” he continues. “It promotes the development of intellectual curiosity, motivation to learn and desire to achieve. It deters children from anti-social behavior, delinquency, and drug and alcohol use. And good parenting is parenting that helps protect children against the development of anxiety, depression, eating disorders and other types of psychological distress.”

“There is no more important job in any society than raising children, and there is no more important influence on how children develop than their parents.”

by Steinberg's